Woman to woman, My thoughts on Lisa Gaitho’s confession video.

First and foremost, I would like to applaud Lisa Gaitho, because uploading such a candid video baring her vulnerability and weaknesses for all the world to see is no easy fit. It takes a whole lot of balls to put yourself out there the way she did, trust me as a fellow vlogger I know. They say all publicity is good publicity, but at the risk of getting your name dragged through the mud, is it really worth it? This is a constant battle I fight with myself on the type of content I put out. There’s a very thin line between necessary and unnecessary content.

Authenticity is important in every piece of work and just as Lisa gave herself confidently to the masses, I’m trying to give my opinion as brutally honest as I can all the while trying not to step on people’s toes. A disclaimer at this point is necessary, these are my views and they might contradict popular opinion and I make no apologies for how you will interpret this.

I was honestly gutted to see so many women against Lisa, laughing at her downfall. Many people focused on the fact that she had broken up with her rich Nigerian man after preaching the gospel of bathing and feeding a man to keep him. As a human, how one chooses to treat their partner is solely and wholly up to you. People are different and what works for one might not necessarily work for the other.

Lisa opens up about her struggle with discovering her spirituality, drug abuse, exploring her sexuality, abortion and barenness ; all very apparent issues to the modern day woman. We fail as a society and as women when a fellow woman is in pain and being honest and all we can do is bash her for it. We like to pretend that we are living perfect lives all the while suffering from these same, if not more, problems.

Among the key things that stood out to me included the fact that she lost her virginity at the tender age of 14.

Society today has teenagers engaging in sex at way earlier ages. People would like to cast stones and call girls whores like sex is a one person affair, while missing the whole point completely. We cannot stop the sex, let’s promote sex education in our schools starting from primary level. Ignorance is not bliss my dear parent, and just because you don’t speak about it doesn’t mean your child doesn’t know.

Kids today are influenced by music and movies which are for the most part misleading. Abstinence teaching alone no longer holds water in the current society. Teach them how it’s done, healthy sexual practices, intimacy, what to expect, saying no, respect, contraceptives and most importantly, consent! She narrates how she got pregnant at 18 and aborted 2 weeks shy of her 19th birthday. This goes back to sex education and lack thereof.

Her choice in men also reflects the lives and realities of many. She has been cheated on more than enough number of times by men she loved. She has been lied to by a married man. She has jumped from one relationship to another seeking love. She has not given up on love despite her past experiences. Come on guys, who can honestly say they have never been in her shoes? Love is all we have to hope for in this world and there’s nothing more beautiful than giving and receiving love.

Love is an addictive drug, you taste it once and you never want to lose the feeling. Cut a girl some slack for wanting to show off her blooming love and for choosing to give her all into it. You don’t have to agree with her methods but if sharing her life to that degree helps her cope, let her.

You can only be young for so long and the mistakes of our youth eventually catch up to us. Her current reality is that she is unable to get pregnant because she got infected with an STI that blocked her tubes. Lisa attributes this to being a consequence of having sex in relationships and straying from God’s Word. Healthy sexual practices and choices are important in life. Regular checkups being among them. Sex is not just physical, alot of it involves the emotional aspect and it is believed that we carry with us a piece of the souls we have let between our legs.

We also cannot afford to ignore the fact that she is choosing to stay single and celibate while 30 years and back in her parents house. Women are breaking their backs bending over for a slice of the luxurious lives they see socialites living on social media. That too is a choice, and if you choose the fast life, you have to be willing to run with it the whole 9 yards. That life is not for the weak and what you don’t see on social media is the type of shit these women actually have to endure for that 3 day flight to Rome or Dubai. Lisa has lived the fast life and somehow she still wasn’t happy? That speaks volumes ladies! Don’t let Instagram fool you, hold on to your dignity. Que Sera Sera! If it’s meant to happen, it will. Don’t rush the process only for a few days of pleasure. It could cost you way more, including your very life. All I can say about her going celibate is, protect your ‘nyau’ sis, you only get one!

Her struggle in finding her spiritual and religious compass in the world is something we all struggle with at one point in our lives. It is healthy to question things and I believe God encourages it. The sad part about her exploration is that it was guided depending on the values of the man she was dating at the time. She had no strong foundation holding her from swaying back and forth. She had turned Muslim as well as Freemason at different times due to men. None of it gave her peace of mind until she returned back to God.

I really truly wish Lisa the best and hope she finds the peace she so desperately seeks. Lisa is only human and she has made mistakes in the past, that doesn’t mean her fate is set in stone. Give people second chances. The internet however, never forgets and I hope as we try to be authentically ourselves, we will practice wisdom to not overshare. Dear internet, please be kind and allow people to be different. Sometimes it’s not for you but for the uploader, welcome difference and uniformity with equal respect.

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